i like how u tried the "no rhyming" thing. Not very many people do that style, probibly because it's really hard to make a good song that way, but i think u did really good with this one. it sorta "fits" the song, but i'm no professtional so if i sound like an idiot then i'm sorry. good job.

__________________
You kill the thoughts
If you kill the man
Only to find
His thoughts will rise again

RIG:
Fender Delux HH strat Guitar
Crate 20Watt
Fostex digital 8-track
Squire P-Series Bass